Celebrating Success

This weeks weigh-in: -3.2 lbs
Total lost:  56.8 lbs

And I called it.  It's funny how closely I now monitor the way my body works and responds to things.  Nonetheless, a great loss this week, and even if I subtract the past two weeks gains, still down 1.2 lbs more than I was three weeks ago.

So this was the last week of Weight Watchers 2010 Momentum Challenge.  Basically for 10 weeks we focused each week on a different factor that contributes to our success with the program.  Being that this was the last week, our topic was celebrating successes.  Carol, my leader, asked us if we celebrated our success, or if we just focused on all of the failures.  This really brought me back to a year ago when I was still at the beginning of this whole journey.  I planned tons of rewards - one for practically every five pounds I lost.  Now, almost 60 pounds later, I've realized that I've only given myself two of those - a haircut/color after my first 20 lbs, and a ring when I hit below 200 pounds.  I also had other less materialistic ideas, none of which were ever rewarded.

It seems that now, losing each week has become an expectation, instead of a success.  If I lose, I'm happy, but I look at it as what was expected.  If I don't lose, or gain, I get frustrated with myself and beat myself up mentally, going over and over what I've done wrong.

I need to change this outlook.  Not only is it hurting my progress and frustrating me, but its completely disregarding the fact that a year ago, 183 pounds seemed light years away, and truthfully somewhat unattainable.  I ignored my weight in high school, but I'm pretty positive I weighed 183 somewhere around 9th grade.

That being said, I'm focusing this week on the things that I do well, and also I plan to come up with a new rewards list for my short term mini goals.  I'll be checking back in with an update on those things!

Why thank you, scale.

This week's weigh in:  +.6 lbs
Total lost: 54.2 lbs


Yes, I gained today.  And yes, I'm thankful.  Why?  Lots of reasons.  First off, I'm thankful that after the ridiculous amount of unhealthy food I've consumed in the past week, I've only gained .6 of a pound.  I'm also thankful that I DID have a gain, because there's no motivation in rewarding negative behavior.

I've spent the past hour looking at progress pictures of many people I've met on the Weight Watchers message boards, as well as other random people who have posted their amazing progress in various places online.  Other than possibly my own success, there is absolutely nothing more motivating to me than seeing the success of others.

Today at my meeting, my leader Carol pulled me aside after I weighed in.  She handed me a form for Weight Watchers "Role Model of the Year" contest, and told me that she would like to nominate me.  I can't explain just how good this made me feel.  She has been an essential part of my entire journey so far, and to know that she believes in me and my success enough to nominate me for something like this makes me so happy.  They choose 6 grand prize winners for the contest that get to go to New York City, get a makeover, clothes, etc, and then are featured in an issue of Weight Watchers magazine!  That would be pretty awesome, so let's all hope I win!

When things get frustrating and difficult, all of these things are a reminder of why its worth it to put the effort in every day to make myself healthier.

Inner Reality Check

Today I woke up feeling skinny.  Sometimes I can push my confidence to this level for a short time, but it never lasts very long.  Five minutes into staring at myself in the mirror, I notice my flabby arms, or the loose skin, or the fact that my stomach still just refuses to go away.  Getting ready for work, I put on my size 12 jeans, and still can't quite grasp the idea that they actually fit.  Back at the mirror, I'm picking at the fat that's still pushing over my waistline.

Really, does this cycle ever end?

I've been thinking lately about how much of a mental battle weight loss is... and I truly believe it's so much more mental than physical.  No matter how many successes I have, I will always find the flaws.  I have been trying to focus on the positive, no matter what, and realize that I still have a ways to go in this whole journey. Unfortunately my mind likes to default to the feelings that are normal and easy - the negatives.

My Weight Watchers leader said something in our meeting the other day that really stuck with me:

"Sometimes there will be difficulties along the road, and you will be ready to give up.  Think of it this way - If you planned to take a trip from Florida to Washington, and got a flat tire in Oklahoma, would you move there!?"

With that, it all makes just a little bit more sense.  :-)

Crab and Corn Quesadillas

3 flour tortillas
2 oz 1/3 less fat cream cheese
4 oz white crab meat (or lump crab meat)
2/3 cup corn (canned, or already cooked)
1/4 cup roasted red peppers, diced
1 tsp caribbean jerk or cajun seasoning
1/2 tsp ground black pepper
1/8 cup fresh cilantro, chopped
spray butter
olive oil cooking spray

Combine cream cheese, crab, corn and roasted red peppers in a bowl.  Add caribbean or cajun seasoning, black pepper, and cilantro.

Spray 10" skillet with olive oil spray and heat to medium.  Spread 1/3 of mixture onto one half of each tortilla, and fold over.  Spray each side of tortilla with spray butter and heat on each side for approx. 3 minutes.  Cut each quesadilla into two pieces.  Serve with salsa or sour cream.

Servings: 6
WW Points per serving: 2

Chocolate Peanut Butter Banana Protein Shake

I've started taking a protein supplements after my strength training workouts, but I'm constantly looking for new ways to "prepare" it, and keep it interesting.  (i.e. I cannot drink protein powder with water.  YUCK.)

Today, I was really craving something sweet, so I made a milkshake.

Chocolate Peanut Butter Banana Protein Shake

1/4 cup Fat Free Vanilla Ice Cream
1 Sugar Free 60 Cal Jello Chocolate Pudding (the single serve already prepared cups)
1/2 Banana
1 scoop Protein Powder (mine is Pineapple Banana flavored)
1/2 tbsp Reduced Fat Peanut Butter

Combine all ingredients in blender.  Add water as necessary for consistency.

1 serving
WW Pts: 7  (High point, but very good and filling!)

Chocolate Orange Cake

Over the weekend, I was looking for something to make to take to a small party, and I really wanted something sweet.  I knew I was taking a friend of mine to the party with me, and she is a vegan.  This gave me motivation to find a great recipe for something healthy and sweet that she could also enjoy.  Fat Free Vegan Kitchen came to the rescue, with Chocolate Orange Cake.  


Oh my.  This is one of the best cakes (and especially fat free cakes!) that I've had in a long time.  I didn't take any pictures, as the presentation wasn't amazing, but it still tasted wonderful.  I did make a few substitutions in the recipe.  I didn't have soy yogurt on hand, as I assume many don't, so I substituted 1/4 cup canola oil and 1/2 cup unsweetened applesauce.  Yes, the oil does add a little fat, but not much.  You can substitute all 3/4 cup for applesauce if you'd like!  The cake is meant to be prepared in a Bundt pan, but I made it in a regular 9 x 13 cake pan, and it worked wonderfully.  Just be sure to watch the cooking time in this case as it may not be exact!


Chocolate-Orange Cake

1 1/2 cups unbleached flour
1 1/2 cups whole wheat flour
1 1/2 cups sugar
2 teaspoons baking soda
1 teaspoon salt
1/2 cup cocoa
1 teaspoon cinnamon
3/4 cup soy yogurt
1 teaspoon vanilla
2 tablespoons balsamic vinegar
1 1/2 cups water
1/2 cup fresh orange juice
2 tablespoons grated orange peel

Chocolate Icing:
1/2 cup powdered sugar
1 tablespoon cocoa
2 teaspoons orange juice
1/4 teaspoon vanilla extract (or 1/8 tsp. if double strength)
--plus extra orange juice as needed

Orange Icing:
1/2 cup powdered sugar
1 teaspoon orange juice
1/4 teaspoon vanilla extract (or 1/8 tsp. if double strength)
--plus extra orange juice as needed

Spray a Bundt cake pan with non-stick spray and dust it lightly with unsweetened cocoa. Preheat oven to 350F.

Combine the flours, sugar, baking soda, salt, cocoa, and cinnamon in a large mixing bowl. Add the yogurt, vanilla, balsamic vinegar, water, and orange juice. Beat by hand or with a mixer on low speed just until well-combined, about 1-2 minutes. Stir in the grated orange peel, and pour into the prepared pan.

Bake for about 30-40 minutes, until a toothpick inserted in the middle comes out clean. Cool in the pan for 10 minutes and then invert it onto a serving platter and cool completely.

When the cake is cool, make the icings. For each icing, mix the ingredients in separate small bowls. One half teaspoon at a time, stir in enough extra orange juice to make a drizzling consistency. Drizzle the chocolate icing over the cake, wait a few minutes for it to set, and then drizzle the orange icing.



16 servings
WW Pts:  3 per serving (when made with 1/4 cup oil and 1/2 cup applesauce - adjust for substitutions)

I'm experimenting today...

I have been following the Weight Watchers weight loss program since January of 2009, and have lost over 50 lbs in the past year.  A major part of my success has been learning to cook for myself in the healthiest and best way possible.  I used to constantly eat out, eat excessive frozen/processed foods, and eat a lot of carbs and very little fruits and vegetables.  I'm learning to enjoy making low fat healthy foods, and they still taste great!

Lately,  I often find myself saying to my mom, roommate, friends, that "I'm experimenting" in the kitchen.  Sometimes I'm pulling random ingredients out of the fridge and cupboard.  Other times I've found a recipe that I'm evolving into something better, faster to make, healthier, you name it.

Through all of this, I have had many successes and failures, but I am slowly learning to cook.  I am constantly sending recipes to friends and family and recommending new things,  so recently I decided that a blog may be the best way to bring it all together in one place.  Hope you enjoy it!